MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR

Posted by: Maureen Holloway | Nov 6 2009 12:00AM

I wish I were crafty, but alas I am not. I am artsy, yes, but not crafty. I aspire to be – I mean, I have a glue gun, but I am afraid to use it. And while I make fun of crafty people with their homemade potpourri and their crocheted toilet paper roll holders, I secretly envy them. I thumb through Martha Stewart Living and gaze at her decoupage and her stenciled lampshades and think, “Wow. I could do that”. Then I think, “Wow. What a colossal waste of time”.  Then I think, “Wow. It’s cocktail time already”. And so ends another day.  No, but seriously. My sister-in-law is crafty. She makes birch bark candles and picture frames, and beads her own jewelery, and she’s not a stay at home mom or anything. She does something really important in finance somewhere.  My friend Donna whips together cushion covers and redecorates her house in an afternoon. Leslie makes her own greeting cards. Fiona makes her own freaking paper, for the love of God. The last thing I made was a Popsicle stick ashtray, which didn’t work out all that well.  If I could make something myself, it would be shoes. Yeah baby! You’d be all “Wow I love your shoes! Where’d you get them?”, and I’d be all “I made them myself. Out of birch bark.”  And that would out-Martha even Martha. But it’s not going to happen. Because when it comes to craftsmanship, I defer to people who make things better than I can, and that would be just about everybody.

Now, seeing that it’s Friday, if I’m going to make anything, it’s going to be a martini.


Happy weekend.



Filed Under: Main


COMMENTS (13)

Elaine
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 11 2009 7:51AM
in my time, we had to learn these things--knit, crochet, embroider, too many of these I can no longer do because the eyes are not good enough.

Karen
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 10 2009 10:19PM
Hi Mo, I love your comments on the show. I wake up especially to hear you in the morning - I am now retired and don't have to get up for anything - Life is grand!!! I am a craft junky. I do lots of crafts but never long enough to get good at them. But I have a great time doing them. Your humour and your twists of phrases are things that I envy. Thanks for making me smile, laugh and just feel great every morning. K

snooze
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 8 2009 8:01PM
OMG Its Sunday Already!!!! Make one for me 'cause tomorrow is MONDAY!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH>.

merren
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 8 2009 10:50AM
Don't sell yourself short the craft of making a perfect martini is one to aspire to. Thanks for making me laugh!

IG
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 8 2009 10:13AM
I am jealous too, I wish I could make a martini. (no material)LOL. My sisters are like that (although one owns a flower shop). It makes one wonder were one finds the time or patience for such a hobby.

Nikki
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 8 2009 9:18AM
Never underestimate the creative prowess and skill it takes to make a perfect martini. You sure can't do that with a glue gun.

Scott
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 8 2009 8:45AM
I have two things in my tool box, a phone book and a check book.I make money not crafts.

Annie
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 7 2009 8:27AM
It can be done, the Make Your Own Shoes thing. Hasn't Daniel Day Lewis mostly retired from acting to become a shoemaker? For His Left Foot and his right foot. Let us know if you meet him.

Jim
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 6 2009 5:35PM
When I was 15 I tried to Be-dazzle our Golden Retriever. That pretty much ended my craft carreer - although the dog looked pretty cool.

Laura
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 6 2009 3:05PM
i'm jealous, wish i had a crafty mind but just wasn't born in me.

Janice
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 6 2009 2:44PM
I hear your pain Mo, cause I am one of those crafty people but my friends just keep saying that I have too much time on my hands cause of the things that I do. I have been known to spray varnish on river rocks to keep their "wet look" and I have also individually sewed "feathers" for one of my childrens Halloween costumes so I guess crafty does eventually have a good side :) Love ya lots.

Maureen Holloway: Oh Janice. You are a goddess.

The Only Girl
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 6 2009 11:54AM
I am totally with you on the not so crafty thing. My talents seem to be more in the area of house cleaning. A cruel joke from the Gods I'm sure. But I have been fortunate enough to be on the receiving end of Leslie's handmade greeting cards many a time. And I am always both impressed and awed at her beautiful work. She has enough crafty talent for both her and me, so I guess that evens things out!

Maria
RE:MAKE CRAFTS, NOT WAR
Nov 6 2009 11:36AM
While your at it make a martini for me! Actually, make a punch bowl full of martini and we will all be over after work. Happy Weekend to you & yours!

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