WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?

Posted by: Maureen Holloway | Jan 18 2010 12:00AM

It seems inappropriate to concern one’s self with anything other than the horrifying situation in Haiti, but life on earth is like that. Towers crumble, wars rage, children starve, but still we watch TV, go to dinner parties and obsess about our hair. Well I do, anyway. If it helps, I feel guilty about it. I gave money to the Red Cross, but I can’t bear to watch the news. Does that make me a bad person? Maybe not bad, but maybe shallow. I don’t think I’m lacking in compassion; I give to a lot or worthy causes, and am actively involved in fundraising efforts for hospitals and medical research, but I don’t have that urge to serve that distinguishes so many worthy people. I don’t want to help out in a soup kitchen, or work with the disabled, or fly to Haiti and help them dig their future out of the rubble. Thank God there are people that do, but my support comes from my chequebook.

This regrettable squeamishness may be partially the reason why I said something truly stupid on the air last week.  Obviously I wasn’t listening closely when John Derringer was talking about the death count in Haiti – I thought he was talking about how much money was being raised in Canada, so when he said “I think they’ve reached about 500 thousand”, I responded with “Wow! That’s fantastic!” Good one, Mo.


But I’m not alone:


*”To have your niece die in your arms is the greatest gift from god." - Celine Dion

*”I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness." - Alicia Silverstone

*”If you think this is was an accident, applaud.” - Geraldo Rivera, talk show host, to his audience on Natalie Wood's drowning

*”If only faces could talk...” - Pat Summerall, sportscaster, during the Super Bowl

*”How the f*** am I supposed to get in then?" - Kate Moss, on being told that the only available toilet on a photoshoot location had no door

*”You can hardly tell where the computer models finish and the real dinosaurs begin.” - Laura Dern, about the special effects in the movie Jurassic Park

*"I've been up and down so many times that I feel as if I'm in a revolving door." – Cher

*"Being a Scientologist, when you drive past an accident... you know you have to do something about it because you know you're the only one that can really help." - Tom Cruise

*"I wish I was an octopus so I could hug ten people at a time!" - Drew Barrymore

*"It was a sobering experience." - Lindsay Lohan on rehab



Filed Under: Main


COMMENTS (10)

Lisa B
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 19 2010 9:40PM
When my daughter asked me tonight why when locking the car it peeps instead of something else. My quick dumb wit replied well how would the blind people know the door was locked. It flew right by her, but my younger son was right on it. It was a good laugh for all of us. Trust me it happens all the time at my house. Just wanted to say I love you on the show and when I can't tune in, in the morning due to walking our new puppy, I check out the blog.

Donald
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 19 2010 5:17AM
When my Mom passed away a couple of years ago, a card was passed around at work and someone had wriiten Congadulations, she is with her maker...I was like W.T.F, but then it was explained to me in her culture it was the ritual of life..No shit.

Jim
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 4:19PM
OK, this is a true story - the night Terry Fox died, a friend of mine was a late night DJ at CKMP in Midland Ontario. Trying to sound dramatic he blurted out the words " it looks like Terry Fox is on his last leg" Fortunately I was likely the only one who was listening in Midland that night. If you don't believe me - he has been a sportscaster at the Owen Sound radio station for a gazillion years. I won't mention his name - but I know he remembers - and there aren't too many sportscasters in Owen Sound!

Laura
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 3:02PM
As a fellow Sagittarian, I can relate to the occasional stupid comment. Although, your ratio of smart over stupid comments,exceeds mine, by far. Hey, at least you didn't say "Happy 9/11". And don't forget while on air,you were encouraging folks to make a donation, as you had just done. So we all knew where your heart was. Luv listening to you guys, in the morning.

Jeffie Boy
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 2:57PM
Wow! That’s fantastic as in that's unbelievable... No apologies necessary, we know where your heart (and your funny bone) is.

Dan
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 2:54PM
Mo: I saw this on the interwebs and thought of you and all your problems at the cottage: http://lifehacker.com/5451065/make-a-diy-no+kill-mousetrap-with-a-toilet-paper-roll I guess it is no help when you close down for the season.

Julie
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 1:42PM
How about James Brolin with "Happy 9/11

Maureen Holloway: Classic

Jim K
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 1:30PM
Hey Mo We all slip up from time to time. Here's one I like-“I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger

Sharon Whiteside
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 12:56PM
Hi Mo - I work for a non profit organization and we certainly rely on our many volunteers to open their hearts and put events together and work with the people we help...but none of that would be possible without the help of the people who open their chequebooks to us..so no need to feel guilty - you are making a difference. My Dad once told me "If you are not part of the solution, then you could part of the problem"... so keep up the cheque writing... Take care.. Sharon

Mike Delaney
RE:WHO FELL OUT OF THE STUPID TREE?
Jan 18 2010 12:36PM
Although I have not been able to find the clip I'm about to mention, I'm assured it exists and the friend that told me aobut it saw it on TV. Picture Hollywood Squares featuring both Danny Bonaduce and Leif Garret. The question "Say you're in the park and you find a empty potato chip bag full of drugs, what would you do?" is posed to Bonaduce. His response while looking down at Leif Garret in the centre square was "I think I'd say "Hey Leif, I think I found your chips". I this clip is ever found I would love to see it. Looks like Pony Boy and Cola got the last laugh on the Soc.'s.

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